Oh boy…it’s been since Thanksgiving since I blogged?!?! To say I’ve been busy would be an understatement really. Life, my life, has been full. I started working again. That is, working for a paycheck! I’ve enjoyed it tremendously. I’ve returned to teaching. In the past few months I’ve come to understand that, yes, I am a teacher. Teaching is the very core of who I am…and it comes naturally to me. I enjoy the challenges it brings and just absolutely love watching a child actually “get it” and learn something.
The only downsides to me working outside the home is that I have less time to spend with the kids and life is a bit more hectic. I don’t have a lot of extra time to keep up with normal everyday things so the house is a little messier and the hubby has to pick up a little more slack. But, I wouldn’t change it for anything. I needed to work for myself…to keep that essential part of me intact.
I have been soul searching about careers amongst other things. Now that I have figured out that teaching is my “thing” the only questions that remain are the what, who and where to teaching. I am currently teaching at the pre-school level and it is satisfying for now. However, knowing myself a little better now, I don’t think I will be there for 10+ years because I need “routine change” (see a previous post). I would love to teach at the college level but I’m not sure what I would teach. You see, I’m trained in music education, and that is no longer a passion for me. Teaching music really didn’t bring me joy…at all. I want to live a full and rich life. I am not going to settle any longer. So the quest continues towards a fulfilling career for me. I’ll get there eventually…
It feels like I’m in a transition stage in my life. I seem to have multiple transitions going on at once and it’s keeping me busy…not fulfilled…busy. I really want the “busy” part of life to go away! Oh my gosh! It’s so draining to be this busy! And it is hard to explain to anyone who doesn’t have 3 children or an anxiety ridden husband and son. There are always loose ends to tie up, children to guide, children to soothe, children to bring to extra-curricular activities (all 3 have 1 each), schedules to manage (mine, theirs, ours), appointments to make or make it to (hopefully on time)…it’s just so much to keep up with and can be very overwhelming. It makes life busy…not full. There is a difference. I want the fullness of life…not the busy of life. When I have down time, time to do something for me, I’m too tired to do anything but veg or sleep. I’m wondering when this transition stage will end…hopefully soon. At the very minimum something has to change…needs to change. Question is, will it happen…the change? Only time will tell.
Until then, I run the race I’ve been given to run. I will run it the best I know how and strive for living a life to the fullest. A life full of joy and happiness. I know it’s out there somewhere for me. I can just feel it! Cheers!
So glad to have you back!! I don’t have 3 children, but I do have two and applaud you for even having time to think of what your dreams and aspirations are. I cannot wait to see where God takes you.